Create in me.

My thoughts are swirling swiftly about as I hurriedly type this post. Life is about changes. I know this. Yet, sometimes life's changes catch me so off guard, I almost feel winded. Changes are often a reflection of the lessons God is trying to walk us through. I know this, too. I also know that sometimes the changes that we endure are completely unseen.

That is where I find myself. In one part of my life, God has led me to let go of some of the people in my past. Unbeknownst to me, these people had a death grip on my life. It wasn't until they were released from that place that the penetration became evident. I believe God did this in order to prepare me for the next steps in his path for me. We have to let down the walls before we can seize the city.

As I slowly began releasing these people from my heart, I began to see life with different eyes. It is almost as if Jesus has given me a glimpse into His heart. Never before has the phrase "I feel your pain" meant so much. One might say that my empathy meter has gone berzerk. I can't even walk past someone, these days, without peeking into their very soul. Countless tears have been shed concerning people I don't know, for reasons I couldn't begin to explain. Their pain was written across their countenance and I felt it as if it were mine.

Concurrently, I have felt the love and joy of Christ. I can see His reflection in the eyes of his believers. My heart soars when I see His love and the faith of those who gather at His feet.

In all this, I find myself asking, 'How would Jesus handle this situation?' or 'Am I missing the mark? Are we entertaining angels and sloughing them off? Are we meeting the needs of God's people?' Ultimately, I'm asking, "Am I doing my job?" I can't answer that and I don't know what direction God is leading, exactly. I may not know for a very long time. What I do know is that God has a purpose for all of this. He is conditioning me for some race that is yet unseen. I just hope that I'm ready when the gun fires.